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Shadow era dead
Shadow era dead










And yet many times I feel a poignant sense of isolation and loneliness.

shadow era dead

I have tried to understand better the meaning of the Atonement, and sometimes I have wonderful insights. In the past, I often said my prayers in a rather mechanical fashion. And yet I have come to understand to some degree what Jesus meant when He prayed, “O my Father, if it be possible, let this cup pass from me: nevertheless not as I will, but as thou wilt” ( Matthew 26:39). Heavenly Father has answered this prayer and continues to answer it daily as I continue to pray.

shadow era dead

My first prayer was a prayer for strength to endure this disease to the end and for a feeling of peace. PrayerĪfter the diagnosis, I did not pray for a miracle cure. He is there to help all of us bear our suffering, to listen to our prayers, and to give us peace. I must rely on my faith and my knowledge that God is good, that He knows me, and that He is aware of my circumstances. But I realize that ultimately Heavenly Father is in charge. I have renewed my passport in hopes of visiting an old friend in Germany, and I ordered more flowers for my garden. Far from it! I intend to live my life as fully as possible as long as I can. However, I am not going to just lie down in bed, turn my face to the wall, and wait to die. I am now working on the acceptance stage. 1 I felt I had dealt with the first four stages during my previous encounter with cancer, but I find that some of these feelings still emerge every now and then. What does a person do when faced with a death sentence? People often go through these stages of grieving: denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance. Beyond that, the doctor told me, there was nothing that could forestall the progression of the disease.

shadow era dead

You might have several months or several years.” We decided I would undergo drug therapy to prevent further bone damage and to help with pain management. The first question I could manage was “How long do I have?” The doctor replied, “I can’t tell you that. However, I had had so many good checkups since my first bout with cancer that I had become rather complacent. My daughter and I looked at the doctor, speechless, and then I lamely said, “Well, at least I have my will made out.” I knew that breast cancer can return 10 or even 20 years after an initial episode. Now I was at my oncologist’s office to learn the results of a previous routine blood test. It had been almost six years since I had had surgery and chemotherapy for breast cancer, which had been discovered during a routine mammogram. “Your cancer has returned.” I was shocked at my oncologist’s words.












Shadow era dead